Birth Mothers Day👩‍👧

Birth Mothers Day

No words can even begin to explain how hard today is for me, for those of you who don't know it's #birthmothersday . A day just like every other day I think of my mother, wondering what she looks like, what traits i have of hers, her favourite song and why I was given up for adoption. I have absolutely no hatred towards my mam. I don't know her but I hope I will some day I feel like it gets harder today even tho it's just a name given to a day. Today is a day for adoptees and birth mothers world wide. A day dedicated to the amazing women who gave birth to us. It's a hard day for all. I miss my mam so so much. It's mad to miss someone I can't remember and know nothing about but I love her none the less. There are days I imagine what my life would be like if I was with her and my Big Sister Polina. There a part of me I know next to nothing about but I still love them so much. I can't even begin to explain all the thoughts in my head about her. Mothers who give their children up for adoption are the strongest people I know. They give up their baby, a part of them. For an adoptee a birth mother is a missing piece of their heart. It's the woman we love and want to know. It's the woman we don't even remeber, which makes it so much harder. Many can't put a face to the name. We just go off what our adoptive parents tell us unless we were given info in our adoption case. It's hard. Loving someone you don't know. Imagine loving a complete stranger, you can't, right? That's nothing compared to how we feel. We spend years imagining what she looks like, how she speaks  every little detail we can. We have millions of ideas of what she could look like, it's hard. 

I can't even try to explain how much I love and adore my birth mother. She is an absolutely amazing woman who even tho I haven't seen in 18 years is still such a huge part of my life . She is always on my mind Day and night.  I can't imagine how hard it is to give a child away to strangers. The heartbreak they must feel. I love the fact that even tho we're 1735 miles apart we look at the same sun and moon every day and night. It makes me feel more connected to her. I hope to god that I get to meet the amazing woman I call my mother one day. I am proud to say I'm my mothers daughter. 

I'm so angry about the fact that #birthmothersday didn't Trent on twitter. The fact that it dosnt affect ye dosnt mean you can't show your respect and admiration to birthmothers around the world! Ye are all well able to twee about other stuff this is just one more thing and I just think it's a disgrace. How many times have ye talked about a topic ye didn't understand? Ye do it a lot without realising . So just do something to make others feel better 💁🏼